I had a moment, driving home from errands today, in harsh wind with a crying toddler. I had moment, where I reframed everything that's been really deeply bothering me. Where I realized I needed to make much much more intentional choices with my relationships.
Like the light flipped on and the pieces fit - slammed - into place. I understand much better, without placing extra and unnecessary blame on myself. So, if I can understand, reframe, and reintention my romantic relationships and my approach to them, what next?
Friendship. Or, more so, acquaintance-ship. I had let blow-up drama really infiltrate my soul. And rightly so, because this was awful. I bought into it and responded to being bullied with stubbornness at my own detriment. No, being bullied is not okay. And with less on the line, I might fight back. But this is absolutely not worth it.
Instead of being stubborn and 'not backing down', I am choosing a different path. I am choosing, for myself, to rid my life of negativity and bullying and drama. And how that choice might appear to others is not my concern.
And, on the same vein, I am for the first time actively choosing to let people out of my life. I am forever a fighter and will battle to the death to keep someone - anyone - in my life. And sometimes that's worthwhile. Most of the time? It's not. And there is a huge and amazing difference between passively letting someone walk away, and actively showing them the door.
My door has been slamming a lot lately.
And the people who remain? Multitudes more valuable.
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